


Hang Up the Chick Habit

by StrawberrieShortcake



Category: But I'm a Cheerleader (1999), RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: But I’m a Cheerleader au, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, Fluff, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Lesbian AU, Smoking, Use of the D-slur, but it’s satirical, conversion therapy, crygi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:40:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25682944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StrawberrieShortcake/pseuds/StrawberrieShortcake
Summary: Crystal is an all-American girl. She's a talented seamstress, excels at school, and has a boyfriend, but she doesn't like kissing him very much, and she has a lot of school spirit, especially with supporting the cheerleaders, and she only has pictures of girls up in her locker.  Her parents and friends conclude that she must be gay and send her off to a reparative therapy camp, where she can learn how to be straight.Crystal was on her way to becoming straight, she was the golden child of True Directions, that all came crashing down when she begins to fall for fellow ‘brave soldier’ Gigi Goode.A Crygi But I’m A Cheerleader auWarning!!  Satirical conversion therapy
Relationships: Gigi Goode/Crystal Methyd
Comments: 13
Kudos: 72





	1. Chapter one

Skirts swaying with the movement of hips exposing thighs for a tenth of a second.Cheers being chanted through soft rosebud lips in convincingly false smiles.With every jump, breasts bouncing in their short and tight tops.Each component hypnotizing on their own, but brought together caused a near come-to-Jesus experience. 

Crystal always found herself making her way towards the football field after school on Tuesdays and Thursdays, that was when cheer practise took place.She had a fatuation with cheer for the longest time; she doesn't and never had any real interest in participating, but she just chalked it up to admiraring the impressive backflips and witty chants.

The green uniforms complimented each one of the girls' complexions, even with the sweat dripping from their foreheads down to their cleavage they looked heavenly.There was not a chance in hell they were going to lose in the playoffs next week looking like that and with their routine.

"Crystal!" A voice yelling her name broke her focus.She turned around to find the source, until she landed on her boyfriend of two years standing in the parking lot, "If you wanna a ride home it's now or never!"

Crystal looked back at the girls on the field, who were taking a short water break.She wished this didn't have to be cut short, she loved showing her support for school sports.She sighed before jogging to the parking lot.

"Finally!" He chuckled nervously once Crystal got into his old red rustbucket he called a car, "I thought I was gonna have to physically pry you away.What were you doing there anyway?Interested in being a cheerleader now?"

Crystal crossed her arms, "I just like showing my school spirit, is that a crime?"

He grabbed her chin to have her face him, "Of course not.Y'know, I'm gonna miss you"

"Miss me?" Crystal giggled, "I'll see you tomorrow at school"

"Oh yeah right," He bit his lip andbrought her face towards his.She took a deep breath before connecting their lips; she didn't close her eyes, she never did, she never enjoyed kissing him enough to close her eyes. 

His tongue swirled around in her mouth, not a pleasant feeling but she guesses there's worse, like walking on burning coals or ripping off a hangnail.Her mind wandered back to the cheerleaders, she couldn't see them from the parking lot but her imagination worked just fine.Her attention left the boy attached to her lips, focusing completely on the cheerleader daydream and she closed her eyes in bliss.

***

"Pass the roast beef," Crystal's father asked.Her and her parents were gathered around the table, scooping the food her mother had prepared onto their plates.Crystal grabbed the dish, (her parents noticing the lack of meat on her own plate) and passed it over to her father, "Thank you Cream Puff"

Once their plates were full, her mother reached out one of her hands to Crystal and the other to her husband, "Charlie, will you say grace please?"

"Of course honey,"He cleared his throat, everyone lowering their heads, "Dear Lord, please bless this food that we are about to eat.We thank you for the abundance that You have provided.Please help us to follow Your path, the one you intended us all to follow.And Lord..."

Both parents peared up at their daughter, "Please help us to obey the roles in life You set for us.For all that is natural and... healthy... and sacred, in Your name we pray.Amen."

Crystal furrowed her brows, this evening's prayer seemed strange compared to their typical prayers and her father wasn't one to stray away from the norm.She didn't think much of it and dug into her meal. 

***

Crystal was seated in front of her vanity, brushing her thick dark curls, not caring if she pulled too hard.She's had this night time ritual since she learnt to take care of her hair herself.She felt like a princess, taking in her reflection.She knew pride was a sin, but how could she not find herself absolutely stunning with her light eyes, soft and warm skin, her charming smile, the sprinkle of freckles on her left cheek, there wasn't a part of her that wasn't beautiful in her eyes.

She put down the hairbrush.Her yellow nightgown fell just below her knees when she stood.She slid under her sheets, cuddling the strange pillow she made a few weeks ago.It was a bunch of colourful circles sewn together with smaller circles in the centers, it was very soft and Crystal could barely sleep without it at this point.

Crystal reached over to shut off her lamp, her parents were heard discussing something in the kitchen.But her door muffled their hushed voices and frankly Crystal was too tired to care about what they were talking about.

***

Crystal skipped over to where her best friend and boyfriend were whispering something to each other. 

"Shh, she's coming-"

"Hey Jan! Hi sweetheart," She waved at Jan, and gave a quick kiss on her boyfriend's cheek.Just as she pulled away he grabbed her by the waist and crashed their lips together, forcing his tongue in her mouth.

"Meet me out front," He told her, walking away from them and down the hallway.Crystal wiped her lips on the back of her hand, trying to forget the feeling of his tongue swirling around in her mouth like a fish on deck.

"Don't you hate it when boys do that?" She asked Jan.Crystal struggled with her locker combination a few times before she succeeded in opening it.On her locker door there were many pictures she took last year during the playoffs.Though none of them were of the football players. 

Jan looked out from inside her locker, "Actually I think it's pretty fun"

"Oh," Crystal thought about Jan's words for a moment, "Well maybe he's just not doing it right"

"Yeah, maybe," Jan didn't sound very convinced of what she said.Crystal just shrugged it off, she grabbed her books from her locker and dumped them into her bag.She struggled yet again with her lock.

"Here, let me do it," Jan nudged her away from her locker, "You go see your little lover boy"

"Oh, thank you!"Crystal flashed her a smile before turning around and speed walking down the hallway.

***

"Hey sweetheart?Is there a reason we're going so slow?"Crystal asked her boyfriend.They had been driving for fifteen minutes now, normally a six minute drive.She watched as an elementary schooler passed them on a bike with training wheels.

"Oh, heh whoops.Just have a light foot today I guess"He didn't make an attempt to speed up.Crystal noticed he was refusing to make eye contact with her.She slumped into her seat, watching as other drivers made some unkindly gestures at them. 

By the time they arrived at her house, Crystal had nearly fallen asleep twice.The car was parked in the street, behind a white van with a pink symbol of Venus intertwined with a blue symbol of Mars. 

Crystal tore her gaze away from the van, she reached for the door handle but it swung open before she could.

Her parents stood in the doorway, "Hi Cream Puff, how was school?"

"It was fine.What's going on?" 

Her parents just stared at each other.Crystal rolled her eyes and pushed past them.Waiting inside the den was Jan, a few other cheerleaders and a middle aged woman she didn't recognize.

They all watched her with pity in their eyes, "Who died?"

"Hello Crystal," The woman held out her hand, Crystal shook it, "I'm Ms C.Your parents and peers have something important they wanted to discuss with you, now I'm here to help direct that conversation"

Crystal stared at her, then at her classmates, "I'm sorry, I think I'm confused"

"Why don't you come sit down.I made your favourite!" Her mother directed her to their brown sofa.On the coffee table in front of her were melting homemade ice cream cookies, she decided against taking one.

"Now that we've all taken a seat and we're all comfortable.Charles why don't you start this conversation?"

"Crystal-" Her father stood from his chair, "We all love you.We all love you very much.But lately we've noticed some... concerning behaviours from you.We're afraid you're being influenced by the-"

"Mija, we're afraid you're-" Her mother interrupted, "a... lesbian"

Crystal's jaw dropped, "Huh?" She looked around the room, they all thought this? 

"I myself was once a gay.I work for a place called True Directions, where we help youths such as yourself to understand the cause of your homosexual tendencies and how to heal them"

"Tendencies?What tendencies?"Crystal couldn't believe this, what would bring them to this conclusion? 

"Well, lately you haven't been taking any meat with your dinner" Her mother answered.

"So?" Crystal snapped back, "That doesn't mean I'm a-a-"

"One of the first signs of a lesbian is a change of diet to vegitarianism" Ms C. interrupted.

"Oh and I found these in your locker-" Jan held up her photographs of the cheer squad, "and don't think we don't see you staring at us during practice"

Ms C. smirked at Crystal with a cocked brow. 

"There was also this in your bedroom," Her father held up her pillow for everyone to see.

"Breasts in artwork and/or decorating"

"They're not-"

"You don't even like to kiss me!" Her boyfriend exclaimed.

Crystal looked at everyone in the room, she convinced herself at one point they were all going to jump up and yell that she's been pranked and then all this was going to be over. 

She breathed out after a few minutes of silence, "So you all think this?"

The room kept quiet, Crystal wasn't sure if it was because they were ashamed or they thought the answer was too obvious to say out loud.But their silence told her the answer she dreaded. 

"I can't believe this" 

"Denial is the first step of healing.We'll delve more into it at True Directions" Ms C. placed her hand on Crystal's knee, she swatted it away.

"Healing?"

"It's like rehab, it's where you'll get rid of these bad thoughts and feelings" Her mother answered. 

"It'll only be for a few months Cream Puff, you'll be back with us before you know it" Her father slumped down on the couch beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"There is no way in hell that I'm going-"


	2. Chapter two

Little under two hours later, their station wagon was pulling up into the driveway of a life sized doll house. It was two stories tall, flower boxes rested on the railing of the large balcony, each window dorned white painted bars small enough that a person could only barely fit through, sitting on the edge of the front yard was a child’s playhouse. What really made it deserving of the title of dollhouse was it’s pink and lilac paint job. 

“Is this a joke?” Crystal spat the second the house came into view. Her parents were going to get rid of her at a place like this? 

“Don’t be like that, Crystal. We paid good money for this, it’ll be a good thing for us all!” Her mother scolded. It was pointless trying to argue with that woman, her word was final and that was that. 

Crystal climbed out of the car, slamming the door shut harder than necessary. There was a tall thin woman with pepper hair in a hot pink skirt and blazer approaching them. Over her left breast was a pin with the same logo as the van that was parked in front of her house. 

“Welcome, Welcome!” The woman’s heels clicked on the sidewalk as she approached them, “You must be Crystal, you will refer to me as Madame. It’s a pleasure to have you with us. How old are you?”

“She’ll be 18 in the spring,” Her father answered before she could open her mouth. 

“Ah!” Madame clasped her hands together, “We reached you just in the nique of time! They’re so much more difficult once they’ve been exposed to that liberal arts nonsense. Luckily we’re saving a few this year. Come now Crystal, say your goodbyes and follow me inside!”

“Goodbye Cream Puff,” Her father pressed a kiss to her hairline, “We’ll see you soon!” 

She hugged her mother and gave them a forced smile which dropped as soon as the station wagon rolled out of sight. She turned and followed Madame into the house. 

The inside of the house was just as colourful as the exterior. There were high ceilings, a staircase at the end of the entrance, and fake plants everywhere. Crystal saw a girl leaning on the railing peering down at her from the second level. Crystal waved at her, but she just sneered and walked out of sight.

“In my office, Crystal” Madame opened the door for her. Madame’s office didn’t seem to fit with the aesthetic of the rest of the house. The walls were not painted with the same sickly sweet pastel colours, but rather a deep green one that caused Crystal to feel nauseous. There were portraits strung on the walls, ones where you could feel their judgement seeping through the canvas. 

Madame took a seat behind the desk and gestured she do the same. Crystal tucked her dress under her as she sat. 

“The other girls arrived yesterday, so I’ll catch you up to speed. This is a two month program consisting of five simple steps. Let’s just focus on the first one for now. Admitting your problem. 

When you see a woman, in a short tight skirt walking past you with her long beautiful legs-“

Crystal visualized what Madame described with little effort, she felt her cheeks warm up.

“Or perhaps she’s in front of a mirror, applying lipstick on her soft, full lips. Or maybe she’s in the locker room after gym class. And she’s soaping her body, then her hands trail up and rubs her breasts-“

Crystal bit the inside of her lip at the picture, her face was practically glowing at this point.

“Now, when you picture these, do you have any  _ unnatural  _ thoughts-?“ 

“I don’t think they're unnatural”

“Aha!” Madame exclaimed causing Crystal to jump in her chair, “You don’t even see that it’s wrong! Crystal, we cannot help those who don’t think they need that help. You can only begin to heal once you admit your problem and until then you will wear these,” She placed what appeared to be just some folded grey fabric.

“You will earn the right to wear proper clothing once you’ve passed step one. It’s a difficult and long path to normalcy, Crystal. It is a battlefield of temptation out there, and you’ll have to fight. I know you have the strength to do so, but until then I want you to meet another one of our brave soldiers. Jaqueline!” 

A girl about her age, maybe older, walked into the room. She wore a simple pink floral dress with a white cardigans overtop, white stockings and black ballet flats. On her head she wore a white hijab.

“Jaqueline will you please take Crystal to the restroom for her to change, then show her around the house and give her the rundown of our day-to-day”

Jaqueline nodded and gestured for Crystal to follow her. 

The house seemed much smaller than the exterior portrayed, Jaqueline explained that Madame had boarded off many rooms years ago as she believed that healing was easier on the mind when with others. It just made it feel more like a prison to Crystal, a pastel fluffy prison. 

“So Madame wakes us up at 7:00, we have an hour to get ready, shower, that kinda stuff. Then breakfast at 8:00,” Jaqueline spoke a little too quickly for Crystal to fully grasp what she was telling her, that and trying to keep up physically made it very difficult to focus on anything happening. 

“Trust me, you don’t want to be late. Rock slept in this morning and she spent all day in Madame’s office sewing a quilt and now she has blisters all over her hands”

“Rock?”

“She’s another girl here, you’ll meet her later. Most of us use nicknames instead of our actual names, like instead of Jaqueline I’m Jackie. Her’s is just strange, but that’s alright.

Anyway, there’s group therapy until 11:45, then lunch. After that we have the afternoon to do, y’know whatever, freetime. Then at 2:00, we’re back inside for reorienting exercises. Am I missing something?” Jackie asked herself, “Oh! On weekends instead of the exercises, we have family therapy. Other than that, you didn’t miss much honestly”

They stopped in front of a carved white wooden door, “This is where we all sleep; it’s small but we don’t spend much time here”

Jackie pushed open the door to a decent sized room, the walls were painted pink, the bedspreads were pink, the nightstands were pink, even the carpet had a rosy undertone. 

There were seven beds in the room, three against the same wall of the entrance and the other four on the far end. In the center of the far end wall was a large list of rules, right at the beginning in bold and underlined wrote:

**_‘Inappropriate behaviour will not be tolerated!’_ **

“Inappropriate? Like swearing?” Crystal asked Jackie, but before she could respond a voice interrupted causing Crystal to jump. 

“No, inappropriate as in fucking,” On the bed farthest from the door with a half finished cigarette in hand laid a fair and thin girl. Her bright unnatural yellow hair fell just below her shoulders and popped against her pink background, her eyes were dark and wide, her fingers were long and eight of her nails were long and manicured. A simple short-sleeved light pink blouse hung from her shoulders tucked into a floral skirt which ended just below her knees. It took a moment, but Crystal realized it was the same girl from the balcony,

“You get caught in the throes of sodomy, and it’s bon voyage for you Honey”

“Oh” Crystal forced a giggle, a tad embarrassed of forgetting about that. 

Jackie piped in, “Don’t mind Genevieve-”

“It’s Gigi” The girl,  _ Gigi,  _ interrupted, obviously annoyed with the usage of her full name. 

“Sorry. Don’t mind Gigi, she’s been bitchy since we’ve arrived. She’s a nothing more than a spoiled brat” Jackie spat out.

“Oh fuck off, Cox!” Gigi flipped her off then returned her attention back to her cigarette.

Jackie scoffed, grabbing Crystal by the arm and dragging her out of the room and down the flight of stairs.

“I’m guessing you don’t really like Gigi?” Crystal joked, trying to lighten the mood a bit.

“Well, no. I wouldn’t say that. I don't think I’ve known her long enough to like or dislike her- Oh here we are!” They were back at the entrance, just beside the front door was a pink whiteboard, with what Crystal assumed were the names of all the girls here, and checkmarks next to every name but her’s. Beside that was another list much like the one in their bedroom, but instead of rules there were steps.

**_Step 1: Admiting You’re A Homosexual_ **

**_Step 2: Rediscovering Your Gender Identity_ **

**_Step 3: Family Therapy_ **

**_Step 4: Demystify The Opposite Sex_ **

**_Step 5: Stimulated Sexual Experience_ **

“Step one was easy. We all passed yesterday, all but you,” Jackie took a step towards her, “I’m a homosexual. See? That wasn’t so difficult”

“But I’m not-“ 

“Jaqueline, Crystal, will you please join us” Madame stood in a doorway, gesturing for the pair to follow her inside. Crystal huffed but dragged her feet behind Jackie.

Five girls and Madame sat in a circle inside the room. They all stared at her, and Crystal was suddenly very aware of what she was wearing. Jackie took a seat on one of the two vacant chairs. The seat beside Jackie’s was wrapped in a neat satin bow.

“Come sit down, Crystal,” Madame said, “Unwrap your chair!” 

Crystal pulled the satin bow from her chair followed by the other girls clapping unenthusiastically and some sarcastically. Crystal gave them a small smile and nod, then quickly sat down, she went to tuck a skirt she wasn’t wearing by instinct. She was once again reminded of the scraps she was wearing.

“Hi,” The pale girl with dark hair on her left stood up, “I’m Aiden, I like the macabre. I’m a homosexual”

A curvy girl with wavy orange hair beside Aiden stood and waved, there were red blisters on her fingertips, “Hi, you can call me Rock-“

“She will not!” Madame growled.

“Okay fine, I’m Rochelle. I’m a homosexual and a lot to handle!” She smirked before sitting back down.

“We’ve met” Gigi sat with her legs spread and her arms crossed, clearly not wanting to be there.

“Genevieve!” Madame snapped at her.

The girl stood up but not without rolling her eyes, “I’m Gigi- Sorry!  _ Genevieve _ , and I like girls  _ a lot.  _ I’m a homosexual” And then she had the audacity to wink at Crystal. 

“I’m Jaida,” The next girl said, she had smooth dark skin and had her brown curls tied up, “I’m the current reigning Miss Teen Hettie Wisconsin, and I’m a homosexual”

“Nicolette. Singer, designer, homosexual” The last girl said, flashing Crystal her pearly whites. Her skin was tanned, her hair was bleach blonde with her brown roots on show. 

Madame clasped her hands together, “Now Crystal. I do believe it’s time we had your first disclosure. Don’t be shy or intimidated, this is a safe environment. Why don’t you start by telling us when you first thought you might be a lesbian”

“I’m not!” Crystal felt irritated at this point, “Everyone just keeps telling me that I am!” 

The girls all stared at her, a few let out snickers. Madame scowled at them.

“That is a perfectly normal way to start. Why don’t we go through what was discussed in your intervention?” 

“Well I’m a vegetarian-“

The girls exchanged glances between themselves. Gigi rolled her eyes with a smirk and fell back into her chair, “So are half the girls here, Honey”

Crystal decided to ignore that comment, “I have pictures of the cheer squad in my locker”

“You think that’s normal?” Aiden piped up.

“Sure, why wouldn’t it be? Well I’ve never given it much thought…”

“Have you ever had a boyfriend?” Madame asked, trying to move the conversation along.

“I do. We’ve been going out for nearly two years now. I love him, I really do. He’s funny. He’s handsome. He’s-“

“Got the biggest dick I’ve never seen!” Gigi interrupted her with an obnoxious imitation of her. Crystal’s face heated up, she stuttered trying to find a retort. 

“Have you two ever had sex?” Jackie bit her lip and smirked at her.

“I- um-“ Crystal’s face was hot to the touch at this point, “I-I’m a Christian!”

“Real easy to be a prude when you’re not attracted to him” Jackie retorted without skipping a beat.

“Stop it!” She could feel the tears welling in her eyes, “I’m not a pervert! I get decent grades. I go to church on Sundays. I like cheerleading-“

“Are you a Cheerleader?” Nicky narrowed her eyes at her, looking her up and down then grimacing. 

“Well,  _ no-“  _ Crystal tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, “I just have a lotta school spirit, okay?! I’m not like all of you! Everyone has those thoughts! Everyone looks at girls!”

“But you’re just assuming that,” Jaida said, “you’re just assuming they’re thinking what you’re thinking when you look. But they’re not”

Crystal’s throat went dry, the tears in her eyes threatened to fall, her voice was quiet, “I thought everyone had those thoughts… I just wanna be normal”

“Aha!” Madame exclaimed, clasping her hands together, “So you admit it! You admit you’re not normal. So, why don’t you admit you’re a homosexual?”

Crystal thought of her friends back home, of the way their lips sucked on straws during lunch, how they batted their eyelashes at the boys passing by, or when their shirts hiked up when they raised their hand in class. She never thought that wanting to cuddle next to them during movies was weird. Or that holding their hands during car rides was weird. Or that secretly wishing that the bottle would stop spinning on one of her friends was weird.  _ Doesn’t everyone think this?  _

“Oh my god-“ Crystal sobbed, “ _ I’m a homosexual _ . I’m a homosexual. I’m a homosexual!” 

“Congratulations Crystal!” Madame stood up clapping. The other reluctantly joined, “You’ve just taken the first step towards your true direction!”

Crystal just stared off at nothing, muttering silent words of disbelief.

“Girls, go wash up for lunch. Crystal, You've earned the right to wear proper clothing!” Madame handed her a folded pink dress. Crystal didn’t move, Madame placed the dress on her lap and followed the girls out of the room.

“Oh lord,” Tears fell down her cheeks, drool dropped down her chin, mucus leaked out of her nose, “I can’t believe it. They were right. I’m a homo!” 

She hiccuped once, then the room went completely silent before she collapsed down on herself and sobbed loudly on her lap. 


	3. Chapter three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw: Use of the d-slur

Crystal kept her head down, her hair falling in front of her face shielding her puffy eyes and wet cheeks from the world. There was joyous chatter coming from the dining room, which immediately died out when she stepped foot inside. She didn’t need to look up to know that all eyes were on her.

She grabbed her pre-made plate waiting for her on the counter and sat on the far end of the table, away from the other girls.

The room didn’t lighten up for the remainder of the meal, the only noise was whispering and the occasional whimper from Crystal. 

***  


  
Crystal loved pink, she really did, but looking at her room and wardrobe for the next two months of her life she was starting to regret that claim. 

Pink dresses, pink skirts, pink blouses, pink socks, even pink hair ties; Madame was adamant with their gender roles and pink was the first step. But Crystal couldn’t help but wonder why she bothered to pack her own clothes if she wasn't to wear them?

She took the only bed left unclaimed, the one on the far right, the one against the wall connected to the hallway and closest to the bathroom. A tear rolled down her cheek as she slammed her undergarments drawer shut. The crying hadn’t completely stopped since group therapy, Crystal’s head was beginning to throb at this point. 

“Congrats on passing the first-step, Curls”

Crystal jumped out of her skin at the sudden sound. Gigi smirked at her from the doorway, blowing her gum into a bubble the size of her fist then let it pop. Crystal muttered a small ‘ _Thanks_ ’, refusing to make eye contact with the girl. Gigi strutted over to the bed parallel to hers and flopped down onto it. Crystal resumed folding her new clothes, she felt Gigi’s eyes on her the entire time. 

“You’ve been giggling and skipping around all morning, Little Miss Chatterbox, and now you won’t so much as to smile?”

Crystal’s head snapped up at where Gigi laid on her back, facing the ceiling, twirling strands of her hair with her index. She stared at the girl in disbelief for what she just said. It was a ridiculous thing to say; Crystal could name a thousand and one reason to not be smiling right now and one of them laid on the bed in front of her. 

“Well it’s not like I have a reason to smile at the moment” Crystal mumbled under her breath, not caring whether Gigi heard her or not. She wanted nothing more than to be left alone at that moment.

“What? Miss ‘ _let’s all sit in a circle, hold hands and sing kumbaya until we’re all happy and hetero_ ’ can’t find a reason to fucking smile?” Gigi sat up to lean on her elbows, giving Crystal a condescending smirk.

Crystal knew Gigi was just teasing her, trying to piss her off. She should’ve known better, should’ve calmed herself down but she couldn’t help it. Her blood boiled beneath her skin, she couldn’t explain it but something about that girl irritated her like no one has before. Crystal had always considered herself a person who could get along with anyone, not once had someone made her want to claw at her own eyes and rip her hair out, she’s never even yelled at a person. 

But then one loud pop from Gigi’s gum set her off for a reason she couldn’t really explain.

“I’m so fucking sorry that I’m a little upset after the worst thing that could’ve happened to me just happened!” 

Gigi stared at her with an expression somewhere between irritated and impressed. Impressed that Crystal had the guts to explode like that ( _which she typically did not; she didn’t even like to curse_ ). Irritated with her dramatics. 

“Really? Finding out you’re a fucking dyke is the worse thing you can think of? Fuck, what I’d do to have your problems” Gigi rolled her eyes and Crystal's heart broke. She didn't understand how Gigi could just scoff at her pain like that.

“Why are you like this?” More tears threatened to escape from the corners of her eyes, “Why are you treating me this way? Can’t you show a little compassion-“

“To the girl who’s been bawlingher ass off for the past two hours after finding out a trivial thing we all already knew?” Gigi sat up with her legs swung over the side, sneering down at the whimpering girl, “News flash Sweetheart, we’re all homos here, you aren’t special!” She had a wicked grin, and if Crystal had an ounce more bravery or any energy left, she would’ve slapped it right off her face. Instead her lip trembled and more tears rolled down her cheeks. 

She buried her face in her hands and brought her knees to her chest. Gigi’s smile fell, she knew she crossed a line but her pride was far too strong to do anything about it but flee.

Crystal heard the stomping of her boots as Gigi rushed out of the room. Leaving Crystal alone yet again, something that left an emptiness in her chest. She decided that maybe she didn’t _really_ want to be alone.

***

The other girls were long fast asleep, Jackie’s snores that were audible from across the room, Jaida’s constant tossing and turning, and a loud thump coming from Rock’s corner that could’ve very well been the girl falling out of bed, were all making it very difficult for a light sleeper to fall asleep. 

Crystal laid on her left side, eyes closed but still awake. She was just about to fall asleep when she heard a short lived buzzing noise coming from the bed beside hers. She stayed still for a moment, waiting for the noise to repeat, and then attempting sleep again when she didn’t hear it.

No more than a few seconds later, the noise came back. This time the buzzes were more frequent with the silence between them replaced with soft moans. 

After a few moments, Crystal became concerned. She sat up in her bed, there was a blinking red light coming from under the covers of the bed to her left, Nicky's. She threw the blanket off of her legs and tiptoed to the other bed. 

"Hey, are you okay?" She whispered and tapped the blonde's shoulder. 

Nicky threw the blanket off her head, panic in her eyes until she saw who it was, "Jesus, you scared the shit out of me"

"Sorry," Crystal muttered sheepishly, "What are you doing?" 

"AV, chére" 

"What's that?" 

"Aversion Therapy"

"I'm still not following-"

Nicky took her hand out of the covers, she held a small wand-like objet, almost like a cordless hair-curler, "When you think about girls a little too long, you use this-"

She pressed a button and the end lit up in red and made the buzzing noise, "And you shock yourself so that every time you have those thoughts you feel that pain"

Crystal's eyes widened in shock, she covered her mouth, "That's sick!"

Nicky shrugged, "It is, but no pain no gain. _Tu veux laisser tomber les filles?_ Then you're going to have to start training yourself" 

Crystal's brows furrowed, "We're not dogs!"

Nicky fell back into her bed, facing the ceiling, "According to them, we might as well be"

Crystal didn't have time to ask anymore questions, when the door creaked open and a flashlight was shown in her face. Her face crinkled up and she raised her hands to shield her eyes.

"Get to bed, Crystal" Madame spoke at a normal volume, not caring that there were people sleeping in the room, "You'll need your rest for tomorrow"   


“Sorry Madame, I was just-“ Crystal scrambled to stand up from her position on her knees.

Madame held up her hand to silence the brunette, “It doesn’t matter, just go to sleep”

Crystal nodded and settled herself into bed once more. She watched Madame walked through the room, shining the flashlight at each bed before turning on her heel and walking back out into the hallway. 

Crystal played with the small satin ribbon on the front of her nightgown as her eyes fluttered shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey sorry this has taken as long as it has, I really have no excuse other than I feel like death right now <3


End file.
